Story time:
My ex lived in another town and I went there by train. She waited for me on the station platform. I saw her first and took a detour over the neighboring platform because it was pretty crowded. I walked up beside her without her noticing me. Mind you, what follows was completely impromptu (we were both weirdos):
I looked sideways on her tits (she had nice really big tits, like, top 5% big). I spoke pretty loud so a lot of bystanders could hear it.
Me: Hmm, nice tits! Wanna fuck?
She checked me out from top to bottom.
Her: Sure, why not.
Me: OK. But, I gotta know what you taste like first.
Her: OK.
We went on to make the sloppiest wet kiss tongue-in-throat-style.
Me: Your place?
Her: Yah, let’s fuck.
People looked at us in disgust, shock, or disbelief. Only one guy had the widest grin on his face. While going I gave her ass a good squeeze. The looks on the faces were priceless.
That’s close to one of the running jokes that my wife and I have. When we’re in the grocery or department store and we spilt up for a few, when I find her, I will sneak up behind her and say, “Excuse me ma’am, I know you don’t know me, but you’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. Can I pay for your stuff and take you back to my place?”
I always think I’m funny. She? Only sometimes. Me? Always.
I wouldn’t mind if you offered to pay for my groceries either wink wink nudge nudge
Are you a goer? Wink wink, nudge nudge, know what I mean?
A nod’s as good as a wink to a blind bat!
Only one guy had the widest grin on his face
This looks like Survivor? What’s the context?
I always see it when the lady got smashed in the face by a watermelon but I think they’re really two different events.
(she had nice really big tits, like, top 5% big)
I wasn’t going to read till the end but you convinced me
My wife and I do that sort of thing all the time to each other, and it’s always fun. She used to work as a bartender in a restaraunt, and after work I’d go hang out there just to be with her and sometimes I’d hit on her in the most lewd manner I could manage. And she would just lean into it, it was amazing.
That’s legendary. You must really like acting
It’d be funnier to go like “yeah I’m one of his wives” :)
Disagree
Polyamory is a thing though <3 So it’s not that far-fetched.
Unfortunately marriage law hasn’t yet caught up to that fact in most places but I’m sure it will.
Even with polyamorous surely a surprise wife would raise some eyebrows.
True, I think it’s more the skepticism of my younglings being smarter or stronger than your younglings thing though
Ask them if they’re Mormon to get a reaction
Ooh Mormons do that? I didn’t know, I thought religious people were always so monogamous.
But I think Mormons only allow for a man to have multiple wives and not a women to have multiple husbands. I’m all for polyamory but it must be both ways.
Hahaha that is such a class act honestly I love memes like this