Children of Time is a 2015 science fiction novel by Adrian Tchaikovsky.
In the distant future, humanity seeks to create new habitats for itself on distant planets, terraforming them and seeding them with life. Dr. Avrana Kern is heading one such project, orbiting the tentatively named “Kern’s World”, where the plan is to release monkeys 
infected with a nanovirus that will accelerate their evolution. Through an act of sabotage from an anti-technology group that has also destroyed much of Earth, the monkeys are never released, and the virus instead infects a species of spider, Portia labiata. The book follows the evolution of the spiders and their eventual civilisation, as well as a remnant of humanity that fled to Kern’s World hoping to find paradise.
also children of ruin and children of memory, the sequels, are really good
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yapping about trauma
the more I think about trauma, the more unfair I think it is to make traumatized adults participate in capitalist society when they’re basically kids.
social services should circle the wagons and let people heal and learn before they have to grow up. it should be given the same urgency as a house fire.
like literally it’s not right. you shouldn’t be able to grow up wrong. people who need to learn to love themselves should be given that care. not access, not the option, point blank, provided with mental health resources and professionals.
when someone injures their leg, it’s not, “oh oh I hope you can get the help you need” it’s “holy shit he can’t fucking walk we gotta help”. why is mental health different LMAO
Obviously I’m being ridiculous and describing something that will never happen. Wanting to be dead is a feature, not a bug.
replying about trauma
I think about this all the time. Insane that we’re expected to go through life and deal all the things non-traumatized people struggle with as if we’re not trying to also put together and build up ourselves from nothing but a completely shattered foundation. And worst of all, this massive, gaping wound we’re stuck trying to heal is basically completely invisible. It’s not like we’re walking around with casts on or bandages or something like that, so all the ways we struggle can just get written off as being lazy or irresponsible or whatever the fuck people tend to assume. I feel like the only humane way to treat trauma would be to give people at least a few years off of any responsibility so they can just focus on healing, because the stress of trying to do that while juggling a “normal life” feels like it only aggrevates the wound and is generally unproductive in both areas.