In the US, first of all.

I’ve been diagnosed with ADHD, depression, and anxiety. I’m trying to get tested for autism, but I think I might have 1 or 2 autistic traits, and any unofficial test has me on the low end of the spectrum.

One thing I’ve noticed lately is that I can’t put my brain on autopilot. And this has caused severe work impairment.

Like let’s say I get a job sorting packages or papers. Most people, when they do this kind of job, they need to focus on what they’re doing initially, but after a while, it becomes automatic, and they can do it without thinking about it (to a degree of course).

But for me if I let my mind wander I will literally stop doing the job. So I need to continually focus with 100% effort on what I’m doing. As you can imagine, this becomes an immense mental load, so I often fall way behind other employees at most blue-collar jobs, many times ending up getting fired for underperforming.

That’s not to say I don’t zone out, because I definitely do. I have an over-active imagination for an adult. It’s just that whatever task I’m doing (driving, brushing my teeth, cleaning the house, etc), I have to make an intentional effort to pay attention to what I’m doing.

Thankfully I am in tech, which (by default) engages the brain, but the opportunities for work are slim, so I have to be adaptable to other jobs as well. But obviously with this quirk of my brain, that severely limits my options.

It’s hard to really communicate what is going on and how annoying this is. I’m hoping someone else deals with the same thing, or knows how to talk about this.

Thanks for reading.

  • JayEchoRay@lemmy.worldEnglish
    1·
    19 days ago

    I assume you are getting help and some form of therapy if you received a diagnosis and taking tests.

    I don’t know if this will help and I am sure someone more qualified can correct me, but maybe you can make improvements with framing things in a different way.

    Like you say you have an over-active imagination, perhaps try and frame an element of work towards a goal or make a checklist of what you need to do and reward yourself when you complete say 50% of the goals in the day and try work yourself up to 75% and then 100% of goals. Make it into something you can interact with and look at it like a game and a form of motivation.

    I don’t know, for me I can do things in short bursts when I try and force myself to try move forward and I think the longest streak was when I was able to “hold myself accountable” for doing a certain amount of tasks in a day.

    For me, a common thing that seems to help is to do something and “reward” myself if I make progress which seems to be a generally positive reinforcement to me.

    So I guess try and frame it into a reward system to make yourself feel like you achieved something instead of a burden. I do not know if that is wrong or more harmful but maybe it can help?

    I mean I am coming to terms that I have a little bit of everything while I learn about myself and the closest I got to a diagnosis was an unofficial one of ADHD, Depression and Anxiety