These are the same people who brought you Oracle DB licensing. They’ll fuck you over someday, the countdown clock is already ticking

How is having a functioning government? I hear it’s wonderful

Why isn’t Washington state in there?!

Well then they got PT Barnum’d

Specifically goats

LeCanadazon.ca

They were right as well

Straight

Never seen a both-sides “moderate” in the wild before, incredible

Well y’see there’s this one weird trick where you can declare people not people anymore

American Sign Language is now apparently un-American

Worthy of being submitted to The Register as a sysadmin story

Starfleet Intelligence

There is a small petty part of me that hopes it degenerates into no aid approval for anyone. The South is gonna get more hurricanes, they’ll break first

I don’t hope that of course, because people will suffer.

No they were conservative guys who clearly didn’t understand it was satire

Do you get a Purple Heart if you’re wounded in barracks shenanigans but technically deployed in an active combat zone? It would be a little funny

It blows my mind that when Colbert got his new job he had people coming up to him for years saying they liked his old show better.

They liked his old show, The Colbert Report, better. When it was clearly satire.

Some assembly required

Ironically the Brits got this right with “mobiles”. What’s the key characteristic of a cellphone? That it is portable and mobile.

Everything’s bigger in Texas, including linguistic confusion