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Joined 2 years ago
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Cake day: August 22nd, 2023

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  • This is a pertinent reminder that I too have let the mental load ratio slide at times, young kids here in hetero relationship. For a while we have divided the day-to-day duties into a morning and night activities split. For cooking and cleaning we both handle it as our timing allows and the mess develops. Since my work schedule is more flexible I address intra-day child needs like dropping things off at school, doctor’s appointments.

    My future planning and preparation are weaker than my wife’s or maybe thats the tendency to shift my mental load on her for those sorts of tasks. To balance out I’m the one taking action on most of the activities that were scheduled, shopping for food. In that way the planning step was hers but the follow through is mine (and reliably so).

    Regardless of the actual distribution though of any given tasks or load, as others have shared its probably the communication on the perceived burden that is more important.