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Cake day: November 7th, 2025

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  • From an IFS (Internal Family Systems) perspective, this isn’t great advice.

    IFS views the mind as a system of parts, somewhat like a family. Parts such as managers and firefighters aren’t enemies to silence; they’re protective adaptations that developed to help us cope with overwhelming experiences, often in childhood. Beneath them are exiled parts that carry pain, shame, fear, or other burdens.

    In IFS, every part is assumed to have a positive intention, even when its behavior is unhelpful or self-destructive. The goal is not to tell these parts to “shut up,” but to understand what they’re trying to protect, build a relationship with them, and help them trust the Self—the calm, compassionate, adult center of the person.

    Trying to suppress or silence inner voices may provide temporary relief, but it doesn’t address the underlying wounds. Healing comes from curiosity, acceptance, and unburdening the parts that are carrying pain, not from fighting them.








  • Thank you for this comprehensive and compassionate post about suicide prevention. I want to add a few related thoughts respectfully:

    There’s an essential distinction between suicidal crises driven by mental health struggles (which this post addresses) and the work of organizations like the Deutsche Gesellschaft für Humanes Sterben (DGHS), which advocates for self-determined dying in cases of terminal illness or unbearable suffering. The DGHS focuses on rational, long-considered end-of-life decisions made by individuals with decision-making capacity, often with medical consultation - a fundamentally different situation from acute suicidal ideation.

    Additionally, Ernest Becker’s “The Denial of Death” explores how our culture’s inability to confront mortality honestly can create psychological distortions and suffering. Becker argues that denying death’s reality - rather than integrating an awareness of our mortality into a meaningful life - can lead to anxiety, destructive behaviors, and a loss of authenticity. There’s something paradoxical here: honestly facing death can sometimes be what makes life more bearable and meaningful, while denial can intensify suffering.

    This doesn’t contradict suicide prevention work - instead, it suggests that part of mental health might involve developing a healthier, more open relationship with mortality itself. Both crisis intervention for psychological distress AND philosophical/spiritual engagement with death and dying serve essential roles. The ‘suicidal trance’ you describe may partly stem from an inability to hold both life’s difficulties AND death’s inevitability in conscious awareness simultaneously.