• 6 Posts
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Joined 2 years ago
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Cake day: June 1st, 2023

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  • Haha it was a chore to finish… the urge started at 4am one night so can’t say it was a controlled acceleration either.

    Ttrpgs is a fantastic hobby. So jealous. You’re working with your hands and collaboratively building with a sense of play.

    Can understand things telling pointless… you’re making me question things now.

    Ah yeah this constant meandering does flesh out ones personality. Lack of control is frustrating… Comes at a cost but as people said, it’s all a matter of limiting the destruction. Keep on trucking fellow traveller. Appreciate you sharing your experience


  • Dang… thank you for sharing. It’s really tough when certain interests literally take over your life. The time between fixations of a week feels like you’re just getting time to breathe and resurface before getting dragged down again.

    It’s interesting how you’ve weaned off gaming as I find myself keep coming back to that rush of dopamine. I just change games if I’m getting bored and it becomes a never ending cycle. There is hope for me! What did you replace it with if I may ask?

    Love the idea of nurturing social and outdoor projects. The act of being witnessed by others does help. And you can’t go wrong with nature!

    That superficial knowledge feels like you’re building a big table of contents, good enough to reference just not enough to write the chapters. All depends on your note-taking and documentation I guess.

    Maybe a suggestion regarding closure, as it helped me, was fixating on my past behaviours as it’s own research. I once spent 2 weeks just listing out my rabbit holes: what sparked it, how much time I spent and what point I went from 100-0. At least for me, I could see that the moment my brain had a clear path ahead and “progressing” on such fixation becomes a matter of just discipline/“putting the hours in”, my brain was like ‘boooring, let’s move on’. Acceleration is easy but maintaining speed is a huge challenge. Controlled deceleration is another lol. Reading other responses here reminded me that the times I felt some closure was when I had made something tangible or have it validated by others, however minimal.

    Great to hear you’re becoming more aware of yourself and it’s trending towards positive. Really do appreciate hearing what has helped you.



  • Appreciate your response.

    That acceptance you have gained is key to managing it… And the ability to not get too excited and remembering past moments. I like that idea of setting limits on cost, whether money or time.

    And yes on reflection it’s not a “superpower”. I have seen some people around me manage this disorder in a way that avoided this shallow understanding through good note taking and putting the hours in over longer periods of time. Just trying to see what strategies the folks here employ.

    Your approach feels to me (correct me if wrong), about cultivating awareness to return to the present without getting too invested. You may have worked on it or it may have come naturally over time. You’ve reminded me of my lost meditation practice haha. So thank you.



  • I do tend to admonish myself so yes, giving yourself a hard time is not a healthy long term strategy… need to be kinder to myself…

    Having literal buckets is a lovely idea. Visible and easily accessible. I tend to gravitate towards digital rabbit holes which are harder to “complete”. Getting your hands dirty with physical objects is a great alternative.

    I presume you’ve built the framework over time to try limit the number of projects you’re juggling. Glad you’re making the most of it.

    Appreciate your response :)












  • Thank you for that. Makes too much sense and feels like the big picture to put these things in context.

    Would you be and to share some resources which helped you to this conclusion? No pressure if not!

    Would be cool to see this on a graph somewhere (although I can imagine we can see the correlated variables react in kind). That’s the problem of trying to sell the future and having the “promise” of future value. Seems with Trump in power, corporations will eat but since that value has to come from somewhere. Like you alluded, from the global South or from tightening the working conditions of the workers. And it probably still not be enough to “fix the economy”. There is serious cost to inaction on our part that the future will pay.



  • My pleasure!

    Ah yeah the article is somewhat circular referencing when it comes to evidence provided that having x amount of billionaires is fine and sign of a lovely healthy and beautiful society (as long as they align with party interests). It’s interesting how there’s an implicit assumption in China that there are things like reputation and power which can’t be bought by money. But yes, I see where you’re coming from.

    I’m still trying to chew on your second point. It’s gotten me questioning some assumptions. Billionaires feel like an inevitable emergent property of a market mostly because there are at least 1 billion people in the world who have different estimates of “value”. I’m imagining an “ethical” billionaire who got rich creating some video game in his spare time charging folks a low $5. Would you say there’s a flaw in the society for creating such a billionaire? Maybe it’s on the backs of exploitative low cost chip manufacturers who make computers or some energy provider… or is it that the market will balance since competition will cut into the profits of the first developer which then should, in an ideal world, would curb the growth of the billionaire. If I’m reading you right, you’re claiming that there’s a threshold after which there’s implied “corruption” or collision to allow for unchecked growth?

    In China’s case (at least from the article in this thread, not OP), it seems they ‘cautiously allowed’ the formation of billionaires back on the day to ‘supercharge’ the economy with that extra profit incentive. It’s what that money can buy is the big question and in which China claims to have a limit.

    Thanks for engaging :)


  • I see where you’re coming from. Having read the article, it feels a little self congratulatory, especially since we can only guess as to the motives of the party members and the state in general. There are interesting perspectives in the article which do point to a general trend towards the “belittling of Capital” and improving the general quality of the workers (*who fall in line with the state [*separate topic]).

    I’m trying to avoid words like Marxism/Socialism since I’m still learning and it’s hard to label without full knowledge. I am making a critical assumption that in a global marketplace, where there are monetary and non-monetary transaction costs and discrepancies over value, there will always be billionaires. A metric of “time to billionaire status” is probably better than “number of billionaires” to compare how Marxist/Capitalist the environment is. From the articles it seems that China would have a longer “time to billionaire” than a regular capitalist country. And there is a ceiling to that growth.

    In a billionaire corporation, would you rather the workers be on a higher level of Mazlows hierarchy than one where the workers never get to see the fruits of their labor? Yes the exploitation of any worker is bad but at least from the articles perspective, the average Chinese worker has access to some level of housing and bullet trains and food etc. I presume that’s what you meant by the “inequality in the micro” but please correct me if I’m wrong. The inequality suffered by a Chinese worker vs an American or Indian worker (or any other country where Capital has power over policy) is different. I have absolutely no data to back that claim but at least in principle, the worker in a less Capitalist environment is a little less exploited.

    For the “inequality of the macro”, the Chinese state is trying to be the only Power in town and making sure that Capital (and by proxy the billionaire corporations), does not control the government. When it tries e.g. Alibaba, examples are made. If billionaires are legit terrified of showing off wealth and are slaves to the party, that at least offers a ceiling to growth of the corporation, and by proxy a ceiling to the exploitation.

    As I understood from the article was that the Chinese state has a slightly higher incentive to look after worker and make sure they’re relatively happy since they’re not “corrupted” by corporate interests/billionaires. They have shown some examples in the past to either infiltrate the corporation or keep the bourgeoisie in line. Of course I’m critical of the positive ratings and examples they are stating since it’s hard to separate the noise from false/true signals. Happy to hear critique!

    (Stating my position just in case: I’m terrified of one party wielding that much power over people and opinions. I value freedom over security past the line drawn by my potentially uninformed perceptions of China. Happy to update my beliefs based on data)