Dave Coe

“The injury that is to be done to a man should be of such a kind that one does not stand in fear of revenge. “

• Machiavelli

You Don’t Mess With The Zohan. I was in the Middle East two decades ago and the phone dialing scene always makes me smile.

The Flying Spaghetti Monster.

Salt is not an optional ingredient.

Unsalted butter is a crime against cuisine.

Thank you for self-reporting, criminal. Please stand by, the butter police will arrive shortly.

A good smack upside the head, just because I like you.

One of them has to be pretty small and legless. Having no legs is also a plus.

‘Pages’ comes for free with a $1200 MacBook.

42

Stop eating your Legos.

Nope. An AC just moves temperatures around. If it heats one area, it cools another.

I wear them on both feet.

Well, there’s a new insult: “You soggy-bones looking mother fucker.”

Still got to sell it

So you still have it all?