If they didn’t double space they might have gotten a green squiggly line autocorrection. Ah, memories…

Pelosi for pres! Cause democrats! Ahhh we are so fucked…

Holy shit! He’s still alive?

So he copyrighted the hair too. Not cool.

Nicole and I are meant to be. I just need to set up a crypto account… /s

You must construct additional pylons.

Is Trump afraid of Pootin? It seems more like a profound sexual attraction. Well… maybe it’s both.

I have a door spider. It lives in a crack in my entry door. I’m not sure of it is the same spider as last year, but it makes trap web near my door frame. I think of it as bug protection, it’s eating something I don’t want in my house.

Prude. /s

Combination locks. Tell me to memorize a sheet of numbers, fine. Tell me to open a combination lock combination 03-03-03, I need the locks manual on hand.

TAQUITOS!

Maybe a bird… Wait a minute! Supposing two swallows carried it away together?

Or if there are multiple holes in the walls shine a laser though the holes to get the butt plug trajectory.

Here here! stomps cane

I just made pasta, a nice al fresco, with penne noodles and garlic cream sauce. Throw in some mushrooms and cherry tomatoes and it pairs nicely with a bottom shelf tequila mixed with redbull in an 2 to 1 ratio, FOR THE GLORY OF THE EMPIRE! hits chest audibly

Furry blankets. Great advances have been made in blanket technology in the past few years. Buy a couple synthetic microplush blankets that feel like rabbit fur and cocoon yourself in them. Always helps me. Even if that doesn’t work for you, have hope! There is the hope that blankets may be even softer in the future.

Also, have you tried mushrooms?

20 years ago I would go to a local bar that had free hot wings and usually some spinach cheese casserole on Fridays. Drinks were how they made money. But if you needed food, you could just drink water, you could eat free and they didn’t care. Whole place was dark and smelled like infinite cigarettes and burnt hot sauce. Good times…

Okay. Hear me out.

Minecraft and cough syrup.

Saw headline and spent next couple seconds replaying SG-1 in my head.

…and I smoke too much grass to understand this