What’s the deal with osu? I work in a computer shop and see that icon on customer machines all the time but never looked into it.

That was informative, thanks.

I agree with you, I would be extremely surprised if the Proton CEO supported Trump… I would say very unlikely.

I work in tech and I have a bit of a retail component to my job. This includes selling monitors.

I assure you you’re (we’re*–I can also tell the difference easily) in the extreme minority. The vast majority of people buy color and size, not clarity.

What did proton do wrong? Legit question, I’m out of the loop.

Having been new on both weapons and also having trained people that were brand new on both weapons, I will say that most beginners cannot hit something that far away with anything. What I meant by “intuitive” is that if you miss with a bow, you can see exactly where the arrow went and if it’s too low you can be like “I need to shoot a little higher”. Sometimes it is harder when you’re firing ammunition because they tend to disappear.

Loading either weapon isn’t necessarily complicated, but it is more intuitive on a bow. For revolver you will need to pull the release, rotate the assembly out, remove old rounds, insert new rounds and reverse disassembly. For a bow, you just put an arrow in and pull it back because the previous arrow is already gone. For some firearms, loading correctly can be fairly tricky if you don’t know what you’re doing. For example, if you load an M16 and don’t remember to shake the rounds to the back of the magazine, it can jam the weapon.

If my food sucks and the service was good, I tip them specifically in cash and tell them not to mention it, so it looks like I didn’t tip to the restaurant but it doesn’t screw the wait staff. It also makes the restaurant pay just a tiny bit more in payroll.

Bows are simpler logistically. Nock an arrow, pull, aim, release (“fire”). Guns have more steps up front typically but also make the round-to-round process simpler.

Both have sights that are comparable in complexity.

Form is similarly important for both.

Skill curve is similar for both at the higher end. I think bows are a little more intuitive for beginner through novice (subjective of course).

Size can vary wildly for both.

Bows need more physicality typically, so they’re a little harder in that way.

Feel free to follow with questions if you like. I have some hobby experience with bows and have trained professionally (military) with firearms.

Linux seems catered for the most basic users (grandma) and extremely advanced users (Linux enthusiasts, programmers). I’m in the middle where I’m pretty good on a computer but not that into the tweaking and tuning. I don’t think my demographic is catered to very well.

There’s a LOT of super cool stuff on Linux but a lot of it is buried on GitHub and needs configuration to work right. 1, I don’t have time to find that stuff and 2, I don’t care enough usually to make it work even though I typically could with sufficient effort.

Heck is where you go when you don’t believe in Gosh.

No quick draw mechanic like with katanas and revolvers. Also no dueling with M1.

Maybe inspired by, but definitely not.

For sure man, anxiety can come from a lot of things, but no matter what it’s from it can put you in a brain fog.

Looking back, I was lucky enough to have a group of friends in high school which we cleverly called “the group” (lol), and we were all weird and very likely neurodivergent. One thing I learned early was, weird people are a lot more authentic and authentic is much safer. Sounds like you have had a similar experience.

I’ll hit you up in a dm for contact info. I am also barely on SM… shits cancer imo. I’m going to leave this conversation thread here in the event that maybe someone can take value from it in some amount of time, if that’s cool with you.

5

Also, you suck.

I don’t have a witty reply but I got a chuckle out of yours!

Future me here: sorry it’s a book lmao. I got typing and next thing I knew it’s like 1,000 words. I went through and tried to trim it down as best I could.

So with allistics, as far as I can understand (because I’m not), often the little interruptions that are annoying to us are much less so to them. Pushing through social situations may not “recharge” them (aka they’re introverted) but they can typically do it much easier than neurodivergent people. If you need to be specifically engaged to find social situations intuitive, I would argue you do not find them intuitive. I would bet you’re probably checking a million little things in your head about what they said, how they said it, body language, and so on. Allistics don’t focus that close on it. As best as I can see, allistic communication is like 85% vibe and 15% information. Autistic is more like 90-100% information, depending on “how autistic” the people communicating are. Vibes are still there, but are not felt so much as deduced based on a bunch of little details we see. Broadly speaking, autistic people assemble information from the ground up (little pieces fit together to make a bigger model of something), and allistics assemble information from the top down (often this looks like they want the absolute MINIMUM information and almost seem to get stressed with detail). Example, I work in a PC repair shop. My neurotypical (NT) customers will want to hear “your computer is fixed and ready to be picked up” and the autistic customers will want to know a lot more detail (hey this was a bad firmware update and it damaged a stick of RAM. That led to the lasted Windows update to corrupt and caused your bluescreen) and maybe even learn from the interaction.

Hating change is not the autistic trait. Craving order and routine is. If you are both ADHD and Autistic (this is called AuDHD), often this is obscured because the two conditions want different things. ADHD likes novelty, and Autism likes routine so you would get a bit of both if that’s the case. And the symptoms are similar too, but a little different. For example, ADHD will hyperfocus to the point where you forget your needs like eating, but Autism will have special interests that will seem similar but for longer. For me, a hyperfocus may be for a day or two, but a special interest is like 3 months minimum, and I typically will come back to them over time. ADHD will often not return to old hyperfixations.

I’m not saying you’re for sure autistic, that’s for you to decide. But if you are autistic, it’s not a disability in itself. It becomes a disability because the world is not made for autistic people. When I first learned I was autistic (this is about 2 years ago now), I had a similar mindset (not wanting to appropriate the term “autistic” is actually common in late-diagnosed people, and I was no exception). Anyway, this is what I did:

• I tried to go through and learn the vocabulary and see how much of it applied to me. (First time I took the RAADS-R test I got like 70, and now after years of processing and remembering things I score like 140+). Once you know the words for things, if you’re autistic, you’re probably going to have some “ah-ha” moments where things begin to click.

• Then, as you have names for things and learn, some of the fixes will be intuitive. Hate eye contact? Don’t make it with strangers. Or do so minimally. It’s unbelievably freeing. Like a routine? Do them, and protect them. I get pizza every Friday, and unless something incredible is happening, I don’t miss it. Some things are a little less intuitive. Learning to unmask is a HUGE task and arguably far more to learn and do than understanding autism is. Which brings us to step 3.

• Learning to unmask (what you called unlearning). This is a massive process and there’s a really good chance that you don’t even know all the ways you mask (you sort of mentioned this in the idiom point, where you don’t know if they’re intuitive or you just learned them already). The book I recommended Unmasking Autism by Devon Price is great for this. Some of it may seem too “soft” or dramatic based on you not wanting to be held down by this, but I would recommend it anyway. Remember it’s written for a wide audience, and some of us have it worse than others.

• As you learn to unmask, social situations become easier. Remember that autistic masking is a form of trauma masking, much like a domestic violence victim would “snap into action”? Well once you learn to heal from that stuff, the masking is more voluntary, like acting. And at that point it’s not your body freaking out in fight-or-flight, it’s just performing an act. And if you’re in a position where you can reduce social interactions to a routine (common in retail, sales, and so on), then it’s even easier. If you feel dumb when you’re in social situations, or if you feel smarter when you’re alone and allowed time to solve problems, this will also get easier. Fight-or-flight impacts the activity in your frontal lobe and will make you literally dumber while it’s happening. Not your fault, it’s just how brains work.

So there is some debate about the PDA profile being real or not. A lot of people seem to identify with it, but it also very much seems to be anxiety-fueled so the medical community is like “oh that’s just autism plus stress”. The one thing that is agreed on is, getting your anxiety down is key. You can look into what you’re eating, if you’re agreeing to social commitments you do not want to go to, and a million more things. Impossible for me to say from here really. But start saying “no” when you can safely do so and make time to do your hobbies and not feel sorry for it. Also, about 2-3 years ago, the University of Stanford found that the visual pattern of moving forward (think the animation of the Star Wars lightspeed effect), literally calms you at the neurological level. Going for a walk of any length daily can be hugely beneficial for your health. I know it’s a cliche but it’s true.

As you learn these skills, you will slowly but surely find stressors and remove them happily. There is a good chance you have at least one narcissist in your life if you’re neurodivergent. You’ll likely identify one or a few of them and get away from them.

Lastly, find friends that are like you. I know, easier said than done. But if you’re autistic, try to find local groups and go be weird together without judgement. I found out I’m actually an extrovert, but a super selective one. Most people drain me, but MY people make feel great when I’m around them. It makes it so much easier when you’re not getting shit on for not making eye contact, or if you want to squeeze some putty while you talk. If you’re high masking, you’ll likely feel a little angry because these people are not masking like you’ve had to. It’s a normal part of the process. Just notice it and move on. I don’t think you can add friends on Lemmy yet but I have most other platforms. I’m assuming you speak English because your written English is fantastic. And if not that’s fine. Either way, I’m happy to be your first autistic friend, even if you’re not. I personally think we’re a lot easier to deal with but maybe I’m biased lol

No worries, good luck in your search!

Fair point about the noise but an electric pump and a compressor are different.

Maybe buy a small compressor. Should be able to get parts for that just about forever. And you can do other things with it too, like fool car tires, now dust of things, use an airbrush, air tools, and more.

Thanks!

Hey there, so the first example does seem fairly OCD–like the real kind. A lot of people reference it wrongly so I wanted to double check.

Idioms are phrases that don’t make literal sense. For example in the USA, saying that someone is “all that and a bag of chips” means they are exceptional or really cool. Or that a task was a “piece of cake” means that task was easy.

So to be frank I have dug into each nugget of what you said (I cataloged it, because of course I did lol). And you have every sign of being autistic. I made a list of highlights:

I have a friend that identifies with these symptoms. What could the root cause be, if any? - Masking in social situations

• Not knowing one’s self (original post about masking)

• Has ADHD (you mentioned)

• Hates eye contact (I asked)

• Authenticity is a highly rated trait in relationships (I asked)

• Does not like small talk like thank you/good morning (You mentioned)

• Deep-dives interests for a long time (You mentioned): “for a long time” is important here. ASD/AuDHD typically does them for a long time. “Pure” ADHD does them usually less than a week, often to the point where they forget to eat or sleep.

• No sensory issues but does prefer comfortable clothes over appearance (asked/told): I would argue that’s sensory-driven (comfort is your sense of touch), but may be nothing to be fair.

• Notices traits of utensils but does not bother them (asked): Even noticing them is not typical of allistic people. Could be nothing too, but this is potential sensory thing #2.

• Feels different from others (asked): Super common for ADHD and ASD

• OCD symptoms as a child: Common for ASD kids too. As many as 38% of ASD people have OCD as well, compared to 7% of the general population.

• Seeing through people’s intentions when trying (asked): Fairly common, especially of the PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidant) profile of ASD. I will write about this a bit at the bottom.

• Can see flirting but does not know how to flirt (asked): Not knowing how to flirt is super common for ASD

• Resonates with the example of “old man that hates change always tinkers in the shed”(you mentioned): This is something that resonates frequently with ASD people because of the predictability and being ok with solo activity.

Before I go on: The PDA profile of ASD is basically that being met with demands will trigger anxiety/fight-or-flight (demands could be anything like: questions, plans, decisions, instructions, time constraints and more). The difference is, all those are fine if you consent. Example, We have had this chat and you consented to the parts you answered. But what if your significant other needed you to run to the store while they were making dinner with no notice. Would it be a little annoying or would you total dread it/it would give you anxiety? PDA people also have higher than average social skills when they need to. Example, can you almost magically tell when someone is trying to sell you something or wants something from you? You may be PDA. PDA is huge and has literal books on it, but I credit it with the reason I often considered being autistic (sounds like you considered this before, yes?), but when I would look into it I “wasn’t”.

Ok all that said: if it’s not ASD or some alternate profile (what used to be called Asperger’s Syndrome, or the PDA profile), I am totally stumped. You show so many markers it’s wild. I have no idea how you scored so low on the test. The test is only 80% accurate, so 1 in 5 can’t be diagnosed by it so maybe that’s why. But you have had OCD symptoms as a kid (OCD has 38% comorbidity with ASD) and currently identify as ADHD (up to 80% comorbidity with ASD). Not liking change and being ADHD simply don’t fit together as well. And you survived all these long ass write-ups haha, but that could be the novelty-seeking to be fair! I’m not trying to tell you what you are but IMHO you 110% are autistic and other stuff is helping to hide it. Side note, if me telling you I think you’re autistic is repulsive (this includes earlier in the conversation, like when you said the tests were no different than past tests), PLEASE look into the PDA profile. That is exactly how it would feel. I had a buddy I knew was autistic and it took me 4 months of patience to get him to believe me.

I would love to hear your thoughts.

P.s. I’m glad you’ve caught up on some rest. Diagnosis aside, rest is healthy for everyone and self care is so so important!