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Joined 13 days ago
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Cake day: November 29th, 2025

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  • Ok, bear with me.

    Reality is a collection of sights, sounds, thoughts, feelings… and many many unnamed perceptions too. Vibes, energies… So I just wanted to establish that. That’s the reality that I’m talking about here when I say “reality”. (And then we have our words, descriptions, definitions and maps too of course, but that’s only secondary).

    For the sake of my description let’s call that reality a dark basement room filled with 1000 things.

    Attention is a flashlight in that room. It’s a dark room so where the illumination of that flashlight falls, you see, and where it doesn’t, you don’t.

    That disk of illumination is your world. Everything outside it isn’t just unseen, it doesn’t exist for you. You don’t see it, you don’t have any kind of contact with it, maybe it exists within memory, or theory, but that’s just a ghost to you and fades quickly.

    When you concentrate your attention, that circle of illumination shrinks. You have chosen one part of your illuminated disk of reality over the other and then that other stuff fell into shadow and disappeared. Now you have a new, smaller, disk of illumination containing only the important stuff.

    This can be a temporary shrinkage or a more permanent one. The shrinkage is progressive.

    One of our favorite things to concentrate upon is our thoughts. That’s where our plans, worries and theories reside so the attraction is obvious. It’s very easy to fall into the habit of chewing over your thoughts all the time. The latest engineering puzzle. Plans for lunch.

    Spend your time doing that a lot, in your head all the time, and eventually the sights, sounds and feelings fade and reality becomes just thoughts. A story. Seeing is just a secondhand experience. Thoughts lead to more thoughts. The 1000 strange mysterious nameless things fade away.

    And that’s just one common example. The dark cellar room contains 1000 other strange things too. The feelings of your body. What you saw and felt when you were a little boy.

    What has been lost? What happens to my body when I stop paying attention to it? Where is that beauty and empathy I once felt? What is this alienation and apathy?

    This is the creeping insanity.

    I practice shikantaza meditation. It basically reverses it. I grow.