I’m imagining him in a hobby lobby, dollhouse accessories aisle…

Do they make cock cages that small?

No worries, we all deal with stress in our own ways.

When i had to take my dog to the emergency vet, I got on discord and posted about ten Star Trek memes in under five minutes. One of the guys asked if I was ok, that’s when i broke down and revealed the reason. I was basically looking for attention…

My parents taught me that asking for help meant you are a failure. Does Lemmy have a “raised by narcissists” sub yet?

Ok, my memory failed me, it was multiple balloons with a larger one on top. Here’s a review that features the actress i saw, not sure if they had to modify the balloon count for the Dallas show: https://munroreview.com/2018/09/22/review-cirque-du-soleils-corteo-is-nice-but-underwhelming/

When cirque came to Dallas a few years ago, it was a little person with one (big)* balloon! Most fun I’ve had at a show!

Edit: My memory failed me, but here’s a photo from one of the shows: Corteo

Why do we keep using the word “losing”? If they are selling off, they’ve “lost” the trust/faith/whatever…

I thought sending your children into the fields was what made those farms work?

And I’m a bit of a diva. :)

If you listen to this post closely, you can actually hear the fellatio.

Oh hell, imagine if they had “Rikered” Tuvix, then had all three trapped on a shuttle together. Tuvok would murder them both

New product idea: helmets for dogs

“I can end it in a day”

Last time there was a tornader in Garland, lightning flashed and lit up the jade-green sky. My mother and brother stopped talking instantly, and we gathered the dogs in the Harry Potter room under the stairs.

'Nader didn’t hit us, but it was still a shock to see the sky a color I’ve only seen in jewelry, or the random Pantone®© sample.

This is the way to do it

I blocked my lg from the Wi-Fi after i got a “Kobe Bryant memorial” ad, while playing on my switch… TF?!

McDonald’s tried replacing order-takers (don’t know what they call them) with AI, and it couldn’t even do that…

Plus, planes already have dozens of safety systems that warn real pilots of dangers, they just don’t have enough control to take over flying the plane, which is good. If the lane keeping system on my car is any indication, computers are only as good as the environment sensors attached. When my car thinks I’m doing something wrong, like driving on a street with no curbs and shitily painted yellow lines, the steering wheel vibrates like Doug. Doug is my vibrator…

I hope there is at least one human that has to listen to the filthy, angry, Klingon profanities I scream, while jerking myself raw to hard core, ball draining, homoerotic, gay porn…

And why he keeps suing his debtors out of existence…

Running the country like one of his businesses; into the ground…