they even withdrew from all the pictures we took of them

Magnus Carlsen was disqualified from the World Chess Championship for wearing blue jeans

extremely serious crime

perhaps some kind of “Saw” style scenario could be arranged for these uhh *checks notes* “people”

lease time on google’s quantum computer and pair the word “quantum” with every available proper noun in the English language

haha

they’re finally shutting it down to figure out what’s going on

been playing it slooooowly since launch and it’s just as neat every time I return to play some more

I think I’m definitely getting a bit old to handle the bros. moves inputs well

including, but not limited to, financial assistance for foreign aid, nongovernmental organizations, DEI, woke gender ideology, and the green new deal

what green new deal?! who the fuck is doing the green new deal right now? “hello please direct me to your green new deal adherence offices”

“they said 100% tariffs was all the tariffs you could have. well, they were wrong, Trump tariffs go to 200, 300, 10000%! they should have bought american!”

and all their teeth are missing because of no food and they have been too biologically experimented on for DNA testing and really all 3800 corpses are too far away to see clearly and you wouldn’t want to look at them anyway

original zelda style adventure in the amphibia world

and it will never happen because disney never does anything cool

Amphibia should have a big game

four more years of liberals typing up the steamiest Trump/Putin gay slashfics possible on main, with AI images to accompany this time

if Nintendo changes how their controllers are attached it is most certainly because they figured out a way to make the connection MORE secure, not less

I unironically think the mouse functionality will make this their most creative game library yet (if only because lots of games can safely include a creative mode with controls that don’t suck)

but overall I think Nintendo is past making “weird” consoles since the launch of the first switch, the joycons have let them do the big weird stuff in individual games instead (LABO, Ring Fit) and now the joycons have even more functions. weird is coming even if the console seems standard

Trump dies (somehow)

US starts new war (free space)

climate tipping points pop off (please don’t)