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geneva_convenience@lemmy.mlM to Inventing Reality@lemmy.ml · 1 month ago

Fox News fanfic

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Fox News fanfic

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geneva_convenience@lemmy.mlM to Inventing Reality@lemmy.ml · 1 month ago
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  • Darkard@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    “Iran is putting bombs on dolphins!”

    Magas: “That’s awful! Those poor animals!”

    “Global warming is destroying their habitats”

    Magas: “Fuck those dumb fish, I need my truck to get to cracker barrel”

  • unexposedhazard@discuss.tchncs.de
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    1 month ago

    This story gets reused in every other conflict its so stupid. Russia also supposedly had kamikaze dolphins at some point. Meanwhile there is actual, publicly available proof of the US doing using dolphins for military purposes. Every accusation…

    • underisk@lemmy.ml
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      1 month ago

      Yeah I was about to say, didn’t the US do something exactly like this in the 70s? Turns out it was the 60s and it’s still an ongoing thing; they were deployed in the Iraq war.

      • grue@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        …and it’s still an ongoing thing: they were deployed in the Iraq war.

        Which means my takeaway is that using dolphins for warfare presumably actually works and therefore wouldn’t even be weird for Iran to be doing too.

        The Wikipedia article does say that…

        The Navy stated that since dolphins cannot discern the difference between enemy and friendly vessels, or divers and swimmers, this would be a haphazard means of warfare

        …so the “strapping mines to [them]” aspect of the tweet does seem a little far-fetched, though.

        • sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          1 month ago

          Yeah, the US uses dolphins for naval base perimeter security, for minesweeping, but not for minelaying.

          The Navy SEALS are the ones that swim up and attach a mine/explosive to a ship, not dolphins.

    • MrKoyun@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      Holy projection

  • Twongo [she/her]@lemmy.ml
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    1 month ago

    the average am*riKKKan has the reading comprehension of a 6th grader.

    they got people into supporting the iraq war, they got people believing that puerto ricans eat dogs and cats. they will make people believe this bs.

    • BeMoreCareful@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      At this point, it’s a LOT of sunk cost.

  • ☆ Yσɠƚԋσʂ ☆@lemmy.ml
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    1 month ago

    I see they’re recycling propaganda now 🤣 https://news.usni.org/2022/04/27/trained-russian-navy-dolphins-are-protecting-black-sea-naval-base-satellite-photos-show

    • Einskjaldi@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      Theoretically you could just strap microphones to all the major sealife. Now this sounds horrible but you have to realize that mecha Sharknado isn’t going to just happen without some work.

      • ferric_carcinization@lemmy.ml
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        1 month ago

        Theoretically you could just strap microphones lasers to all the major sealife sharks.

  • Bloomcole@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    “reportedly” “it is believed” “sources say”

    Te MSM excuse to write baseless bullshit.

    • BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today
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      1 month ago

      “Many people are saying…”

    • Patrikvo@lemmy.zip
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      1 month ago

      Attack dolphins is something right out of Red Alert 2. Clearly someone was playing it on the clock and got caught.

  • PolandIsAStateOfMind@lemmy.ml
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    1 month ago

    Flag of iran he used in this post is the monarchist one, which makes it even funnier.

  • chuckleslord@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    “Last Hope” this some copium of the highest caliber. Iran is easily winning this war. They don’t need desperate measures, they have drones.

    • j5y7@sh.itjust.works
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      1 month ago

      And an easily defensible position. And the ability to impose severe costs on their enemy at little cost to themselves. It’s history’s stupidest war carried out by history’s stupidest people.

  • Lushed_Lungfish@lemmy.ca
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    1 month ago

    Uh, did not the USA try this during the Cold War?

  • Aedis@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    Someone call NCD!

    Also wasn’t this a GDI weapon or a Ally weapon in a Command & Conquer game?

    • Sai Somsphet@lemmy.zip
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      1 month ago

      Red alert 3, ally weapon, countered the mind controlled squids I think

    • Rolivers@discuss.tchncs.de
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      1 month ago

      Red Alert 2 IIRC. I believe it belonged to Yuris faction.

      BRB reinstalling.

      • Majestic@lemmy.ml
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        1 month ago

        It was allies who had dolphins in Red Alert 2. Soviets had giant squids as a comparable sea asset.

        Soviets got giant squids, subs (because sneaky commies), flak ships, and missile cruisers. Meanwhile allies got dolphins (which could easily take down squids in a group), destroyers (sub hunting, could see subs and launch helicopter/plane), aegis cruisers (anti-missile defense), and aircraft carriers. Both sides also got hovercraft.

  • subverted_per@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    1 month ago

    They have drones. Why would they bother with dolphins who would be far more expensive and labor intensive to train, and still be unreliable when they can send a robot?

    • PolandIsAStateOfMind@lemmy.ml
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      This is decades old US propaganda piece (and projection since it was US that tried to do this) from Cold War being mindlessly resurrected long after it lost all reason for even attempt it. Also, it didn’t even worked first time, same as pigeon guided bombs.

  • inb4_FoundTheVegan@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    Kamkazi Dolphins is a pretty good band name tho.

    • 0x0@lemmy.zip
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      1 month ago

      I’d go for Orcas.

      • ZeroHora@lemmy.ml
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        1 month ago

        Kamikaze killer whale

        • argarath@lemmy.world
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          1 month ago

          “Kamikaze killer krill” to go for that alliteration bonus

          Aaaaaaaand just before I hit send I saw that the initials wouldn’t form a good thing… Dammit

  • AlHouthi4President@lemmy.ml
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    1 month ago

    Why did OP get banned???

    • Bloomcole@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      “Antisemitism, Zionism, history of transphobia and trolling”

      Now that sounds weird

      • AlHouthi4President@lemmy.ml
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        1 month ago

        We lost another one 😔.

    • ferric_carcinization@lemmy.ml
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      1 month ago

      Modlog

      Different commumity & instance, but might be related

      • IndustryStandard@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        Something similar was posted on .ml a month ago. Did the admins not notice it? https://lemmy.world/post/44911451

        • ZeroHora@lemmy.ml
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          1 month ago

          You mean the admins on .ml or the ones in db0 who banned the guy?

          The article is quite good and is a call to action from a Jewish person to other Jewish to completely oppose Israel and zionism.

          • IndustryStandard@lemmy.world
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            1 month ago

            I am confused. Is geneva_convenience@lemmy.ml banned from dbzer0 or from .ml?

            From my side it is looking their account was banned from .ml, but the post linked by ferric_carcinization@lemmy.ml says dbzer0.

            Or was their .ml ban for something entirely different than that dbzer0 post?

            • ZeroHora@lemmy.ml
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              All bans in the mod log is from db0. The one that I don’t know what it’s from is the one with reason: Rule 1, 2nd strike.

              • AlHouthi4President@lemmy.ml
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                1 month ago

                #savethisuser !!!

                • eldavi@lemmy.ml
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                  1 month ago

                  they’re a prolific poster; it’s surprising to see it.

              • IndustryStandard@lemmy.world
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                1 month ago

                Maybe they insulted China somewhere and had their comment deleted by the admins?

  • someone@sopuli.xyz
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    1 month ago

    That’s why I stopped following news years ago.

    • SirSmoothAES@lemmygrad.ml
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      1 month ago

      Fox News actually argued in court they’re not news, but entertainment. Always interesting to remember.

  • Saymaz@lemmygrad.ml
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    1 month ago

    Is that a diasporoid account posting Fox News slop?

    • geneva_convenience@lemmy.mlOPM
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      1 month ago

      Nawfal is a Zionist shill frequently pretending to care about both sides but then pushing the Israeli agenda when push comes to shove

  • Hackbraten@lemmy.zip
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    1 month ago

    Aren’t dolphins clever enough to realise they’re being used as suicide bombers? If this tactic is used at all, it shouldn’t work.

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