Plot twist, the local kindergarten is called “The Bakery”, the toddlers are called “bagels”…
Man’s long and well documented history of anthropomorphizing and treating wild apex predators like friends and pets.
Are you saying the boy doesn’t love bagels?
Here’s the bear version.
For 10 years, a Virginia man has been secretly feeding bears “to keep them safe from poachers”…
Officials said the man later told them he had been spending over $10,000 a year on food for the bears “in order to keep them safe from poachers and help ‘sick and injured’ ones,” according to a statement from DGIF.
Apex predators must be so confused by humans. Here’s these gangly looking creatures that looks like prey, no claws, no fangs, only forward facing eyes hint at anything different. They act like prey, except when they absolutely don’t, and they become the apex predator. And they keep giving out food and trying to get you to stay in their camps.
this is a great concept for a scifi story: humanity is “the ancients” but all the aliens see of us is when we’re effectively going on nature hikes.
An alien empire captures a lone human vessel and is about to start doing horrible shit, when suddenly a fucking planet emerges from hyperspace and next thing they know their entire species has been relocated and they’re surrounded by a force field.
If you enjoy this sort of story, can I suggest the “Humanity, Fuck Yeah” (HFY) genre? I can definitely recommend The Deathworlders.
It worked once! Now we get to dress them in lil onesies and take em to dog shows!
Got cats to team up. Soon foxes and racoons
my dude, this year my cat trained me to move the shower chair to the opposite side of the shower after i am done showering so he can sit there, soak his testicles on the warm water on the chair and stare down the little “hallway” created by the doorways in my bathroom, and if i open the blinds on the one window he can stare out the window while soaking his testicles. he loves it. he meows until the chair is in the right spot and then meows until the window is open. i can just get warm water on the chair in the right spot when the blinds are open and he’ll jump right up. damn orange testicle soaker
cats domesticated us.
i’ve got one on my lap right now she is so precious but i cannot move or else she will wake up and then she might not let me give her forehead kisses tonight. what then Spacehooks have you considered that?
Cats never got domesticated they just showed up, said well handle the pest problem, and got treated as gods. In fact from what i can tell behavior wise the only difference between an African wild cat and a “domestic” is one let’s you pet them when you eat and the other is full food meow!
i moved and i did not get to give her forehead goodnight kisses. i did not get to give her forehead good morning kisses. who is giving my kitten forehead kisses? it was 3 am last night and she started getting up to the business again
I mean, if it’s that long of a history then we shouldn’t really be seeing it happen by now amirite?
I gave water to a thirsty chuckwalla last weekend. Florida man lives in us all.
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That food is not good for the gator.
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Teaching gators to approach humans for food is not good for either.
Gators* yeah we’re allowed to have one
Considering the type of person who would spend their time doing this, and the fact that a gator is pretty likely to be eaten by another gator which is also bad for the gator…let the simple man give that alligator some damn bagels. There’s way worse happening at the handful of slaughterhouses around the world. At least they’re both happy.
There are many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many
uninformed individuals on this earth, some of which might stumble upon my comment and think “Oh, I guess that’s why we shouldn’t do that, I will have to consider this if I ever feel the urge to feed wildlife.”
You may be surprised to learn that war and famine are widespread on this earth, so is there really any harm in murdering your neighbor? /s
I guess it depends on just how bad those bagels are for the gator I guess.
I mean if it’s literally poisonous to them, or otherwise cause painful or debilitating problems, then yeah even a single case is not defensible.
But if it just makes Mr. Gator a little fat and slow, or extra flatulent, then let’s just let it slide, no?
Or are we just going to black and white it and equate bagelling gators with murder and/or death by starvation?
Do you know what feeding bagels does to gators? I’m curious now so I’m going to go find out.
Edit: Ok fine.
What the fuck dude don’t you know that putting gators in front of keyboards leads to low level VOC exposure which are definitely not good for gators and it’s imperative I say this so all those people outh there that are thinking “gee I’d love to put a gator in front of a keyboard today” but thanks to this information will possibly think twice and I’m just saying if anyone wants to applaud and call me a hero it wouldn’t be unwarranted.
I got curious about this and because I have wayyyy too much time on my hands today, I learned a lot about gators. Including this wonderful man named Gatorboy: https://www.nczoo.org/blog/alligator-care-and-training
There’s a video where he does a song and dance at the end.
We are not equating anything. You stated that many bad things exist somewhere else so therefor one bad thing should be permitted. By the same logic, anything is permissible. It’s stupid.
Gators do not produce the enzymes needed to process wheat glutens. Bagels will likely give the alligator relentless bowel inflammation and diarrhea, potentially cause kidney failure and death. What an animal can eat, including humans, is limited by the evolutionary traits they developed in order to eat things.
Got it, so they need gluten free bagels
So I’ve been reading a lot about gators today because I had the same question after seeing this. I couldn’t find a single source to confirm what you claim about gluten intolerance in alligators. I found several papers on diet and nutrition where alligators were fed grains, and were found to consume plant material in their native habitats.
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0044848613003293 https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0022316622175863
I don’t need to prove that Gators don’t have the enzymes to digest wheat. There are countless things that gators don’t have the enzymes to digest and nobody is stupid enough to go through the list and test for each one.
Gator’s have no fucking reason to have that. Gators have never relied on wheat as a food source.
If anything, the ball would be in your court to prove it exists.
I finished reading the studies and I like to point out that the first study shows while proven to not cause any immediate harm during the 1 year study period it does show the gator does not fully digest the samples. It also lacks a lot of information on the methodology, such as particle size of the food, temperature, and force-feeding procedures. One of the studies that cites it points all of that out. Another study that cites it is specifically about forcing the gators to purge undigested foods from their body as a common practice in aquaculture, as was the first study you linked to: industry funded studies to get questionable practices past regulators.
I think a better study to cite would have been this 1988 study on specifically what enzymes were found in the intestines of the american alligator: LINK
The abstract doesn’t relate to our discussion at all, unless you can prove those are the only enzymes present in the entire digestive system. It only sampled the small intestines, while we know that different enzymes are present throughout the digestive system, like how humans have amylase in our saliva. It doesn’t tell us how those enzymes interact with different food sources either.
As for whether someone should research such a topic, that’s why we have science. There’s a reason we don’t have some guy going “duh, obviously” in a lab in place of like… tests. People have studied what gators can eat. I found two studies on it in less than an hour of searching. I see no grounds to dismiss these studies as they’re pertinent to our discussion. If we dismiss every study sponsored by some kind of industry we’d be left citing highschool science faires.
You were so busy feverishly masturbating your intellect at me that you didn’t notice I already agreed with you. Nice.
Let me guess, smarmy response to this response incoming…
Iol this statment needs to be in a movie.
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When predators become unafraid of Floridaman, they turn into Kaiju and Ultraman from Ultraman Cosmos has to show up & re-wild them
Unrelated but interesting.
Might explain the shark attacks we tend to get here
Fun fact, sharks kill between 3 and 8 people globally each year.
Well, that’s not very fun
What if I told you…
it was the same shark every time? /joke
Feeding it bagels? That’s fine. Well okay not fine he’s getting it used to people but I thought he was feeding it chihuahuas
