real Ace Attorney level plot twists here
“Phoenix, we’ve already determined that neither the shooter nor his “girlfriend” were transgender. Give it up, there’s no trans person involved in this story”
“Well if it wasn’t the shooter and it wasn’t his partner, then it would have had to have been…”
(music stops)
“THE REAL TRANS PERSON INVOLVED IN THIS STORY WAS NONE OTHER THAN THE VICTIM: CHARLIE KIRK”(court loses it)
PHOENIX WTF ARE YOU TALKING ABOUTThis is seriously the best thing I’ve seen all week. Thank you for this.
I made this on objection.lol - couldn’t post the link without making an account so here are screenshots
Nice!!! Looks good!! I wish there were some easy way to make videos like this.
🥰
absolute cinema
I did joke with a friend of mine about the freaks on Twitter transvestigating the shooter. But them transvestigating CK was by far one of the funniest things to ever come out of this. I cannot even fathom the headspace of those people.
Am I a man to the bone?
No.
Am I a woman to the bone?
No.
I’m bad to the bone.
HELL YEAH
IM THE ONLY CIS PERSON IM THE ONLY CIS PERSON“Everybody transgender.” - Albert Einstein
charlie kirk being trans is the best conspiracy so far
The only thing that could have made this derangement funnier is if the photo they used to transvestigate was already photoshopped to have a smaller face
Literally measuring skulls
We’re in the fucking 1800s I swear to beans
When people say we’re in a new Gilded Age, I didn’t think that also meant phrenology would make a comeback.
I’m going to jam my head through one of those star shaped play-doh extruders just to give them a real challenge.
Gender: Elder Thing
If we can get into this persons brain palace, we will be able to harvest spice melange from their ginormous brain worms.
broke: blood and soil
woke: skull and gait
gender? man? woman? I’m a skeleton, hoss.
You know who is also named Charlie?
Charli XCX. That’s right. A woman.
Kirk was a deep cover trans agent for the Brat Summer contingency
Every single time I try to type Charlie on my phone it autocorrects it to Charlotte. Bit of a coincidence, don’t you think?
When your phone does Auto Correcting it’s actually Angel Correcting and god sends an angel down to give you predictive text so you can see the secret messages he reveals to the chosen.
I feel like calling him a victim is giving him a bit too much credit
now we return to the natural order of things
Nature is healing
…that surely has to be a joke
I wish I could say that, but there’s some serious brainworms at play here. I was waiting in a line somewhere a dude was randomly trying to convince me and some other dude that Arnold Swartznegger is trans.
I feel like this belongs in c/slop
