School has started and my teen refuses to use an alarm, leaving me to do the wakeup myself. As thr door is locked, I cannot gently awaken them. So, I decided music was great and chose the following 3 songs (played in this order and the reaction):
- Viva La Vida - Coldplay
- [quiet groans from inside, no movement]
- Baby Shark
- [whimpers and the sound of pillows shuffling]
- Welcome to the Jungle - Guns & Roses
- [door flew open, I was forced to flee]
So three songs seems to be the sweet spot. I’d like to keep it fresh and change daily so they can’t adapt. Please give me your 3-song playlist so I can continue to psychologically torture wake my child for school every day.
Chord Organ Blues - Daniel Johnston
Sound of Da Police - KRS-One
Frank - Bongwater
Originally I was thinking I’ve Got Drugs by The Frogs to open, but it may not be suitable for your teenager.
WAKE UPwake up
Grab a bush and put a little makeup
Chop Suey! - System of a Down
I love SoaD so much :D I was looking for this comment
What’s New Pussycat 7 times, followed by It’s Not Unusual, then more of the first.
Same shit as always
I thought that was to have the best lunch you’ve ever had.
Nyan cat 24 hour loop
Ballroom Blitz - Sweet
Mr Blue Sky - ELO
X Gon Give It to Ya - DMX
Turn Down for What - Like Jihn
Pound the Alarm - Nicki Minaj
Everybody - Backstreet Boys
Wannabe - Spice Girls
Cha Cha Cha - Kaarija
Paloma Rumba - Simon
X Gon Give It To Ya is brilliant, changing my alarms rn
Cha cha cha is a fucking banger and the best thing to come out of Eurovision since Epic Sax Guy.
This is actually my alarm sound
“Get the fuck outta bed bitch go!”
Either What’s New Pussycat is longer than I remember…
Rawr.
My grandmother would regularly play mariachi music at way too early hours of Saturday as she was cleaning because she liked it. I learned to wake up before the crack of dawn on those days so I could be out of the house in time to avoid it.
Anyways, spice it up with things like yodelling, bagpipes, any cultural music with extremely high pitched instruments or vocals, and particularly emotional songs from popular musicals. And maybe throw in a soundtrack of metal pots falling down the stairs or glass crashing in between songs, just to keep them on their toes.
Wham! — Wake Me Up
TMBG — Wake Up Call
Bullfrog ft. Kid Koala — Music for More Morning People
(I used to use Hokus Pick’s “I’m So Happy” but it just hits different under the current presidential administration)
Not gonna cap it off with Wake Up by RAtM?
All Star - Smash Mouth (Kid’s Bop version)
The Pokérap
DK Rap
I had a roommate who would play “Burning Down the House” by Talking Heads every morning at top volume.
It starts slow and quiet, then the drums kick in hard, launching you out of bed. By the end of the song we’d be pogo-dancing around the apartment.
Pick three three of their favorite songs and start singing terribly. I’m talking off-key, purposely wrong lyrics. As loud as you can.
Even better if you can improv the lyrics to customize it just for them.
If they wish to preserve the sanctity of their media they’ll wake up sooner rather than later.
Pick three three of their favorite songs and start singing terribly
no. just their favorite songs in general.
I once had the briht idea of using my favorite songs as my alarm sound.
It just lead to me absolutely hating the songs, because my brain associated them with waking up
Can also mix it up and play those songs on one of those recorders they teach you to play in elementary school.
Wake Up – Rage Against The Machine https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=gFNPzbWROFc
Ride of the Valkyries by Wagner
Elephant Talk by King Crimson
Hocus Pocus by Focus
in the hall of the mountain king would be a great addition to this list.
You need the live performance of Focus by Hocus Pocus from whatever TV show that was. They play it sped up and the song is just extra bananas that way. What a tune.
I was also going to say Hocus Pocus (there’s pizza on your) Focus
Especially if you sing/scream along at the top of your lungs for the last one. I’m actually not even sure it’s possible not to.
I think you’re going about this the wrong way, You won’t have wake them up if they can never fall asleep listening to every song here all night. Tell them you’ll only turn it of if they set their own alarm.
Right now you’re training them that the obnoxious music will be their alarm.
Also, if your kid has an android I love the alarm app called AMDroid. It is super customizable, (who new an alarm could have so many options). It can set to do things like send a notification after a few minutes “are you awake?”, if you don’t respond the alarm goes again. You can set various math or word challenges to stop the alarm, you can make it only turn of if you’re close enough to the router, or at a certain light level, and so on.
Also do you have a way to unlock the door? Not from a privacy breaching point, you shouldn’t do that, but as a you just heard bloody murder and need to get in (or you don’t get any response from them). Don’t let a locked door be a 5 minute difference you’ll regret.
I’ve been using this for years and it’s so great
