Great minds think alike! Unfortunately for me us getting married actually fucked up my ability to get insurance though, which is I guess more a statement on healthcare than marriage 
It’s fun having a complicated relationship timeline and no wedding ring though. It really confounds and confuses the people who can’t conceive of a life path different from their own, which is always entertaining for me personally
there are no hair cutters here that I’d trust to not fuck up my hair with stupid gender roles
This is the worst, I’m sorry. It sucks that it’s such an investment in time to grow too, makes any decision such a big commitment/a lot of pressure.
I know some people have to travel to get an infrequent but important cut because they live where there aren’t decent options, idk if that would be possible for you. I guess you’re still stuck having to trust someone not to fuck you up though and that’s scary regardless, even if you can successfully find a decent place and actually travel there.
I’m very reluctant cause if I botch this I’m cooked, it’s one of the only gender transgressive things I can do rn
That’s so understandable, you’re really between a rock and a hard place there. I didn’t realize until I saw this cut and liked it, but I think if it went bad it really would have wrecked me. My hair has only just started to thin a little too and I think I’m going to have to figure something else out eventually, but I’m trying not to think too hard about it
Congratulations!
My partner and I also lived as a basically married couple for over a decade before finally filing some paperwork a few years back, it’s a fun trajectory for a relationship. Makes it interesting when people ask how long you’ve been together! Did you get rings? We still haven’t because we’re so lazy and cheap lol
Oh wow, that’s a lot of hair! I was a bit reluctant to go as well, but my partner has been getting their hair cut there for a while and the whole shop is super nice and friendly thankfully
I got a really nice haircut today, I love how it looks and feels. First time a professional has cut my hair since before covid started, I had just been sticking to a buzz cut until last year when I started to grow it out. It’s been a rough few days in general but I’m elated at my awesome hair
Third night in a row of not being able to sleep more than 15 minutes at a time because of this shoulder pain. It hurts way less than the last two nights but I still can’t sleep through it. I am getting like fully angry and unhinged at this point, if this goes on many more nights you are going to see me on the news
You’re very welcome 
As far as chickpeas:
Roasted in the oven they make a nice crunchy treat. Toss them in olive oil and put some spices on, bake for about 40 minutes at 350f (175c). Great as a salad topping.
Vegan tuna salad made with chickpeas is pretty good. Mash up a can, then add a bit of mayo and pickle/relish, some spices to taste. Good in a toasted sandwich with all the toppings or even just on crackers. You could also do the same chickpea mash but add buffalo sauce instead (melt butter and add in some hot sauce), then put it in a wrap. This is one of our go to lazy pantry meals, perfect for when work kicks your ass and you just need dinner.
There are a lot of really good, easy curries that center around chickpeas if you don’t mind making rice to go with. We usually cook an onion and some peppers, add the chickpeas and a can of diced tomatoes towards the end.
General advice would be to start small and manageable, get the hang of something and then build on it. Find and follow a recipe, but also trust yourself and your taste to alter it somewhat if need be. It helps to write down changes you make to a recipe so that you can keep trying to improve it to your taste.
If making big meals is a hassle, dinner can always be a random assortment of things you have on hand or can make quickly. Not every meal has to be three perfectly balanced dishes all on the same plate that complement each other.
Also monitoring how busy the dominos pizza closest to the pentagon is
The linear progression of time proves this!
Yes, it’s from a years old meme but the phrase will not leave my brain for whatever reason
https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/butt-mogged-these-zoomers-today
Perfect venn diagram of a post, cool old gun and a cutaway display 
Aw come on! I just got this phrase out of my head after I heard it again like 4 months ago 
Pretty much, yeah 
I used to deliver food to homebound elderly people and the things I’ve seen people living through make me not even want to complain. It could be, and is for so many, much much worse
Stavros Halkias, comedian and podcaster
I recently heard someone describe Primus as “that shit sounds like farts” (complimentary) and now that’s all I can think of when I hear their sick bass riffs
I hurt my shoulder so I’m taking left over painkillers from my partner’s surgeries years ago. We have two different types, one prescribed after their top surgery and one after their hysterectomy. To differentiate between the two I’ve been calling them the top surgery pills and the hysterectomy pills, which makes it sound like that’s their function instead of being painkillers. So that’s been mildly amusing
Shoulder hurts, can’t sleep :(
Was thinking it would be nice to have health insurance so I could maybe get it looked at, but then I remembered that I had insurance for years and still couldn’t actually ever afford to use it really
This is extremely relatable. I wish I could just be blunt about it, but then I’m like calling their entire life choices into question. Wish they were similarly reluctant to judge my life choices, but I guess that’s parents for you