I basically just want to know what you’d wish for if you didn’t worry about others. So that’s the real question, but it’s not as catchy. Three wishes for something only for you. If it helps then assume all the other stuff resolves itself.
The rule is spirit of the law. If you wish for something that happens to help others, it’s fine, but if you wish for something with the goal of doing something good for anyone but you, then you’re turned into Elon Musks right thumb (you retain sentience and sapience, but you’re a thumb. No ability to do anything and you don’t control yourself, Elon does, you’re his thumb.)
Example:
Okay: Your mom is sick and you wish for her to be cured, because you would miss your mom.
Not okay: Your mom is sick and you wish for her to be cured because she doesn’t want to be sick.
And don’t try to rules lawyer it, the genie will get you for that too.
Also only three wishes, it’s a limitation on the genie, not a rule. It’s physically incapable of it. It cannot give you more than three wishes, nor can it be made into something that can do that, nor can it make something that can do that, nor can it make something that can turn it into something that can do that.
Climate change makes me sad. Fix it.
No communism makes me sad. Fix it.
I wish I had my hair back. Just so I have the option of having it instead of having to be bald. Because I wonder if I remember what it’s like.
I wish I had my hair back
For some reason I thought this said “I wish I had hair on my back”
Maybe the monkey paw is actually well-meaning, but unfortunately misunderstands everyone and is really sad to see them disappointed with their wishes.
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End capitalism because I don’t want to show up for work.
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Create walkable cities because I hate driving.
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Eradicate all diseases because I don’t want to get Covid or the bird flu.
Classic communist wanting to genocide the poor defenceless bacilli
Literally me
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I’d wish for communism (it’s the system which benefits me the most)
No climate change (it’s in my best interest that the world does not continue to burn)
Immortality (because the world I wished for is the ideal paradise and would be better than whatever the fuck happens when you die.
With immortality there’s always the issue of being 100% guaranteed to spend centuries buried under dirt though.
That’s just an opportunity to reflect and experience ego death. Not entirely a bad thing
Ok now for some actual selfish wishes
Wish 1 Practical Immortality – No aging, no disease, no accidental deaths. I only die if I choose 2
Wish 2 (this ones for the Posadists) Full command over a high-tech Alien Invasion Fleet - Also has the implication that there are now 100% Aliens out there
Wish 3 Mindcontrol (All shall bow before their eternal empress) No but seriously with this I can make the world leaders who wont step down from my ayy lmaos bend the knee peacefully and avoid most of the large scale warfare . Time to start humanities golden Age I guess. I will be a merciful godess. I promise
No longer physically disabled so i can do more things in life (im cool with keeping the autism), win one of those lotteries that gives you the money in increments so I can afford to leave any job whenever I want, and have my immigrant status being confirmed for obvious reasons
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I wish that every species in the animal kingdom becomes immune to violence inflicted by humans.
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I wish that humans can develop magical abilities that strengthen with their willingness to empathize with other living creatures.
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I wish that everyone had the ability to learn the language of another person after a day of spending time with them.
you had one job!
Average communist who has claimed they’ve read Kapital
I’m using my wishes to turn the world into a magical setting and not setting myself up to be a healer, which I would do if magic existed and people were still fucking things up.
I wouldn’t say abysmal, but convoluted.
Would bacteria, fungus, parasites and viruses be covered by your first point? Cus that could be a major problem
Basically I want magical powers and to see what kind of world we can have where caring about others is a superpower.
Fantastic! No longer thumb
Good wishes! Sadly you are now a thumb. The wishes are still granted though, so you’re the thumb of a vegan instead, which could be worse. And people will be able to learn your thumb language.
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Ability to drink and eat whatever I want with no negative health affects.
10 mil.
Increase my charisma by like 10 points so I can [redacted by VolCel police].
The VOLCEL POLICE are on the scene! PLEASE KEEP YOUR VITAL ESSENCES TO YOURSELVES AT ALL TIMES.
نحن شرطة VolCel.بناءا على تعليمات الهيئة لترويج لألعاب الفيديو و النهي عن الجنس نرجوا الإبتعاد عن أي أفكار جنسية و الحفاظ على حيواناتكم المنويَّة حتى يوم الحساب. اتقوا الله، إنك لا تراه لكنه يراك.
elon gives me all his property
zuck gives me all his property
bezos gives me all his property
genie doesn’t get to say shit about what i do with it.
becoming the super capitalist
I want $500
I want a signed picture of LeVar Burton
I want a 6 month supply of Bombay Sapphire
- I want to hang out with this cool internet stranger
- I want both of us to be immune to hangovers
- I want LeVar Burton to come hang out with us (he can get no-hangover powers too)
Best wishes award 4 u
My body cannot get damaged other than aging. Can do hella drugs without ruining my brain, and I will be cured of my chronic physical disabilities
No more insomnia, this is ruining my life for the past decade
A couple million USD
I’m a simple person, my physical and mental disabilities and need to work are like 99% of the problems in my life
I wish for communism, because most work feels like bullshit
I wish for a dictatorship of the proletariat, because I had being led by sociopaths.
I wish for a red army, because I hate that shitty people have so much power.
I’d wish to be happy (gommulism)
And for your other two?
save em for a rainy day.
maybe one could be to erase myself from the irminsul when i get tired of everything
I wish I was a little bit taller
I wish I was a baller
I wish I had a girl who looked good, I would call her
I wish I had a rabbit in a hat and a bat and a '64 ImpalaYou wished for a wish too much you are now thumb (though taller thumb, baller thumb, with a girl who looks good thumb)
Jokes on you, I’m English, I was already a thumb
Firstly, let’s define a pocket dimension: a pocket dimension represents a place where time flows at 1/1 trillionth of the time that it does on Earth, I do not age while inside, is activated by intention, has a mjolnir-like capacity to return to my person by intention, death in there would mean being ejected into the real world, and I can choose to be ejected into the real world via intention. While I am outside the pocket dimension, the time inside flows at 1/1 trillionth of the time on Earth
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A pocket dimension in the form of an fire opal ring in which I get to live as a protagonist in a magical battle world. It is replete with narrative direction that is perfectly suited to me, compelling enemies, larger than life combat, incredibly high threshold for skill expression in magic, arcanologically infinite sustainability of resources, and space for creative solutions. It places me central to the conflict and progress such that I am capable of pushing the world forward by solving problems and interacting with people. It is light-hearted like Pokemon as opposed to grimdark like Warhammer.
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A pocket dimension in the form of an ornate silver band in which I can activate a debug menu of real life. It has a UI, but can also be controlled like a lucid dream. I can play through contrived scenarios with people. I can pluck them from real life or create them myself. I can study with teachers and compete against peers of my choosing. I can choose slices of time and space from Earth’s past to see what happened. My own avatar can be modified in size, shape, age, and engage in noclip. I can fly or teleport. The dimension has an automaton that can be summoned to help me think through what would be useful to interrogate about situations. It has a repository of save files for situations and knowledge that I choose to store. I do not want or need for material comfort in this dimension (addiction, hunger, thirst, bathroom, etc.).
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Practical immortality - I only age or die if I choose to. My memories are retained even during manipulation of my form. I can choose to regenerate or ahem degrade my body to any age I have attained. Any injury or illness sustained that would render me incapable of using my brain would instantly teleport me to the nearest city center with phone and wifi, clothed, out of danger, sober, clean, maxed out on material comforts, at age 25 with my two pocket dimension rings on either index finger. If a finger has been lost, the ring will be on the next finger over. If the hand is lost, then it will be in my pocket and still capable of being evoked. If, for some reason, there is no city center with both wifi and phone network, it will prioritize wifi and then phone, and if neither are available, then I will be teleported to the most populated city center on Earth. I will be equipped with a phone with three emergency contacts that is capable of using the local network, the equivalent of $300 USD in 2025 in the local currency, 10gb of wifi data, a valid passport, and a translation app if necessary. If I feel I am in danger or imprisoned I can choose to unstuck myself with this same effect. If I am imperiled upon respawn it will take me to the geographically next closest city over in the same conditions. Any injury, illness, or mental illness sustained can be regenerated via intention.
Oh pocket dimension is my wish too, though just a happy place where I can learn, heal, chill, cook and so on. Also ski and dive, but never be so happy I would prefer it to the real world.
I sort of got lost in the world building and themes I was working with so I said to hell with actual balance. Absolutely a real consideration, but it was a very specific and fantastical genie to begin with
No worries, your world building was cool. I guess maybe Id want a “happy place” to retreat to and also the ability to learn like they do in the matrix
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Nice try. You’re not stealin’ MY wishes
